By Bernie on 30 Jan 2006
Those who have seen Writer-director-star Albert Brooks' bomb "'Looking for Comedy in the Muslim World" already know one thing: Muslims have no sense of humor because Muslims do not make fun of themselves.
On the other hand, here's a joke that obviously originated with a Jew making fun of overbearing food-yenta Jewish mothers:
Moshe was talking to his psychiatrist. "I had a weird dream recently," he says. "I saw my mother but then I noticed she had your face. I found this so worrying that I immediately awoke and couldn't get back to sleep. I just stayed there thinking about it until 7am. I got up, made myself a slice of toast and some coffee and came straight here. Can you please help me explain the meaning of my dream?"
The psychiatrist kept silent for some time, then said, "One slice of toast and coffee? You call that a breakfast?
Here's a joke written by Jews making fun of their cheapness and eagerness to avoid paying taxes:
Rabbi Rabinovitz answers his phone. "Hello?"
"Hello, is this Rabbi Rabinovitz?"
"This is the IRS. Can you help us?"
"Do you know Sam Cohen?"
"Is he a member of your congregation?"
"Did he donate $10,000 to the synagogue rebuilding fund last year?"
Here we list Film Titles pointing fun at Jews written by Jews and appreciated by Jews:
Oy of the Beholder - Singles kvetch about their awful partners.
Girls Interrupted - Women's section of shul are told to be quiet during davening.
Seder House Rules - Zeda explains the law on Pesach.
Angela's Kashas - Woman tells all her secret recipes.
Supernova - Rocket scientists discover powerful strain of lox.
Dredel Will Rock - Toy comes alive during Chanukah.
Sleepy Halah - It's Friday and dad fills up on bread then dozes off.
Goys Don't Cry - Rabbi explains why only Jews celebrate Tisha B'Av.
Goy Story 2 - Issy divorces shiksa, then marries another.
Mun on the Moon - Astronauts find hamentashen filling on the moon
Stuart Ladle - Mouse makes chicken soup for shabbos.
The End of the Affair - Sheva Brachos finishes at 3am.
You will rarely find jokes making fun of Muslims. Of course Muslim humor is just not funny. The reason of course is that the punchline is always the same. Let me give you an example:
A Muslim walks into a bar....... then BOOM!!!! 20 innocent men, women and children are blown to smithereens.
Two Muslim tourists walk into a museum....... then BOOM!!!! 200 innocent men, women and children are blown to smithereens.
Three Muslims go into a Bali night club....... then BOOM!!!! 400 innocent men, women and children are blown to smithereens.
Nineteen Muslims take a flight to New York....... then BOOM!!!! 2996 innocent women and children are blown to smithereens.
See it doesn't matter what the body of the joke is - the punchline is always the same.
What has allowed Jews to live in every nation on this Earth for thousands of years is their ability to make fun of themselves and to laugh at adversity.
Muslims, on the other hand, have recently demonstrated they cannot take it when someone pokes fun at them. They cannot accept other people's customs nor do they tolerate differing opinions.
"Well, this is a broad brush you stroke, Bernie; isn't it a bit bigoted to make such comments?"
It is - but only if the statements are not true. If I say blacks are lazy - that is bigoted because it is not true for all blacks. If I say the Irish love to drink - that is not bigoted - because it is part of Irish culture and the Irish themselves perpetuate this brand of humor. But make fun of the Prophet Mohammad and you die.
"That statement is a tad extreme", you say.
Certainly not; read this:
Danes in Middle East on alert as Muhammad cartoons row grows
DENMARK warned its citizens in the Middle East to be cautious amid anger in Muslim countries over newspaper caricatures of the Prophet Muhammad. Masked Palestinian gunmen briefly seized a European Union office in Gaza City to protest and the Denmark-based dairy group Arla Foods said two of its employees in Saudi Arabia were beaten by angry customers. Arla said a boycott of its products in the Middle East was nearly total. The Danish Red Cross said it was evacuating two employees from Gaza and one from Yemen after receiving death threats.
Scan Islamic forums and you will find unanimous calls for death to the infidel cartoonists who portrayed Allah in a humorous manner. Normal people who have been brought up in a tolerant society will find these cartoons rather innocuous. Certainly they never rise to the level that Larry Flynt achieved with his Jesus cartoons. Indeed every Christian country in the world tolerates cartoons poking fun at Jesus.
None of these cartoons tried to incite violence against Muslims; the purpose of printing them was to show how artists in Europe were afraid to express themselves because of Muslim Intolerance. By their response Muslims only proved the point. What I find offensive is not these cartoons but Muslim intolerance altogether. I would be less extreme if there were not so few Muslim moderates. But I count a handful in a world filled with a billion and a half faithful to strict Islam. Where are even thousands of Islamic moderates going into the streets to condemn the terrorists? There should be millions of them protesting. The voice of moderate Islam is pathetic.
Assalam-o-Alaikum, i live in Saudi Arabia. When i got to know the whole damn story, now i am planning to visit denmark and get those cartoonists arrested or if i fail get them arrested, probably i will kill them.
Posted by: Farooq Jan 30, 2006 6:11:07 AM
By the way, the greeting Assalam-o-Alaikum means "Peace be upon you!" What a hypocritical religion!
The only solution is to prohibit Muslims from emigrating to the West. They will not accept any culture they infest, but rather through threats and violence try to force that culture to adopt their ways and religion. It is the nature of Islam to force the infidel world to convert or die.
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