Offensive Arab Jokes Explained

I apologize for not offending you
Photo Credit: Dragon Laffs

In response to my article Offensive Arab Jokes, a number of my readers in the comment section complained that the jokes weren't funny, didn't make any sense, were offensive, and were untrue. First let me explain why I mock Arabs.

There are approximately 422 million Arabs in the world [Wikipedia], the majority of whom are Muslim [375 million or about 88% of all Arabs Wikipedia]. These are the people I ridicule simply because anyone who follows an ideology of hate, intolerance, war, pedophilia, misogyny, slavery and brutality deserves to be made fun of. Either they know their so-called religion is a savage, primitive sect, or they are dupes who have never read the Qur'an and have no clue what Islam is all about.

But now to explain some of the jokes to these dupes:

Q: How do you get 30 Arabs into a telephone box?
A: Tell them it isn't theirs!

As I explained in my article Understanding the Middle East in Less than 5 minutes, Muslims occupy almost ⅕ of the entire land mass of our planet yet they want to also occupy Israel, which has 10,612 times less space because that land isn't theirs.

Q: What's 8 miles long and has a combined IQ of 56?
A: A Parade in Saudi Arabia.

As we learned from my article Muslim IQ, the stupidest people on Earth come from Islamic countries.

Q: How can you tell if an Arab just had sex?
A: His eyes are all red from the mace.

As was discussed in my article Muslim rapes of non-Muslim girls an epidemic, many Muslim men believe that women who do not wear a headscarf are asking to be raped. Therefore the joke is that when Muslims have sex, the women try to defend themselves against rape by squirting mace into their eyes. Is this one really hard to understand - Do I really need to explain this?

Q: Why did they close the Iraqi National Library?
A: Someone stole the book.

Arabs are just not book lovers. Visitors to my blog article Mahmud Cannot Read were informed that in the past 1,000 years, Arabs have translated fewer than 10,000 books into Arabic while tiny Norway, with a paltry 4.5 million people, translates that many every two years. Get the joke now, Ahmed? There's only one book in the whole Iraqi National Library.

So as to the charge of being offensive and not funny, yes they are offensive, that's why I put the word 'offensive' in the title. If you are offended by offensive Muslim/Arab jokes, don't read past the title.

As to not making any sense, read the articles I cited.

As to not being true, where is it written that jokes must be true? Isn't it enough that they have a kernel of truth? For example, a Jewish joke that has been circulating for years goes like this:

Q: How do you get a Jewish girl to stop having sex?
A: Marry her.

Jews and non-Jews laugh at that. Does that mean it's absolutely true for every Jewish girl who gets married? Obviously not.

So Ahmed, get a thicker skin, start making fun of yourself as the Jews have. No one makes more fun of Jews than Jews themselves. That's because we have a sense of humor. Perhaps if Muslim Arabs spent more time laughing they wouldn't be keeping millions of their fellow Arabs in refugee camps for more than 65 years just to spite Israel.

As a reward for reading this far, here are a few more offensive jokes:

Q: What do you call Arabs in front of a trash pile?
A: A family portrait.

And now, anticipating an "I don't get it" from some of my readers, here's an explanation for that joke:

Here's something that I find puzzling: Nine Muslim men have been jailed for having sex with underage girls.

I thought Muslims weren't allowed to do impressions of Mohammed.

Like many jokes, this one sadly contains more than a kernel of the truth (1).

Q: Have you heard about all of the great things Muslims have started doing since emigrating to America?

A: Me Neither.

Q: How do Muslims like their music?

A; Full Blast.

Why test on animals, when we have mosques full of Muslims?

I just put a deposit down on a new Porsche after inheriting some money. I told everyone on Facebook I couldn't wait for the new 911 to get here...

Next thing I know thousands of f*cking Muslims are trying to add me.

Innocence of the Muslims is a film about Islamic violence and terrorism. In reaction to this the Islamic world has made an effort to dispel these myths by engaging in violence and terrorism. Now tell me that's not funny.



Islam Watch, 26 Feb 2013, Oxford: Pedophile Muslim Boyfriend Prepared Underage Girl for Gang-rape Using Sex Toys and Numbing Cream

According to a report by the BBC, Mohammad Karrar, pedophile boyfriend of a 12-year-old girl, had used brutal assaults on her to prepare her for gang-rape by his friends and acquaintances.

The girl told the court that Mohammad Karrar, her boyfriend, used sex toys and numbing dental cream on her genitalia so that she can bear the pain of gang-rape by a group men, all Muslims, at an Oxford flat.

This was heard in court as part of a pedophilia gang-rape case, committed by 9 Muslims men from Berkshire and Oxfordshire, accused of sexually exploiting 6 underage girls, between 11 and 15 years old.

Sobbingly she told the court that 5-6 men then came to the flat and raped her on the kitchen table.

Karrar and 8 other accomplices are being tried for a total of 51 sexual offences, including rape and trafficking of underage girls from 2004 to 2012.

She said that it hurt her “much”, and in order a stop her from crying, they gagged her mouth.

The men drank alcohol and took drugs before taking turns to rape her, she claimed.

She informed the court that Mohammad Karrar and his brother Bassam also took her to sex-parties in Wycombe where groups of men, as many as 10, would "swarm around" her, playing horrendous sex-games, including handcuffing her, horse whipping her and dripping hot wax on her.

### End of my article ###

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