How Old is Too Old to Wear a Miniskirt? 2 Answers from Planck's Constant

Plaid miniskirt, white stockings, Schoolgirl

Red Plaid Miniskirt
Flickr Photo by: PlaidTartanSkirts.

It's been three weeks since the start of spring and my fancy has yet to lightly turn to thoughts of love. I looked outside my office window a few minutes ago and there was nary a miniskirt in sight, so perhaps that might be a contributing factor. It's only 50 degrees F in lower Manhattan so I suspect I will just have to wait a tad bit longer before the young ladies shed their coats and excess coverings.

I say young ladies but to be fair to all women I suppose I should omit the word "young." Our society worships youth but is that only because of advertising hype? Should we wonder exactly how old is too old to wear a miniskirt, for example?

I am of two minds on the matter. I believe, on the one thigh, that it's none of our business. If a 70 year old woman wants to wear a miniskirt and push bra in the street, that's her business. On the other thigh, if the view presented is hideously unsightly that is another matter. As a society we have a right to ask our local governments to interfere in the private lives of individuals if there are foul and noxious odors emanating from their homes or if they generate noises so loud as to disrupt our ability to function normally.

Years ago, Jersey City, New Jersey put an ordinance into effect banning the playing of boom boxes because they had become so unbearably noisy. Here's a quick joke from the 80s: Question: How many people does it take to bury a homeboy from the ghetto? Answer: Six. One to lower the body and five to lower his boom box.

But I digress.

So back to the miniskirt. Any woman, of any age, even one without the right body shape, can wear a mini skirt, if she wants to, that's her business; But... I draw the line if I see a woman, even a young woman, walking in public looking like these women [WARNING - Do not look unless you have a very strong constitution and you are not eating and certainly not if you are at work] then I believe I have the right to barf on her shoes.

Actually the question shouldn't be, "How old is too old to wear a mini-skirt?" The question should be, "When should a woman (of any age) wear a miniskirt?" If you can look like this

Photo Credit: Forever Amber

then I don't care how old you are.

Of course, if you are Muslim, then the season doesn't matter, your lady love in her burqa looks the same in all seasons. In the whole of nature, everything that has life, becomes inviting in its season and in the time when furthering the species is most important. But Muslims fight the process of female attraction and hide a female's natural beauty because of their disgust and distrust of women. Muslims like to say that Islam freed women from the tyranny of males of pre-Islamic society, but what will free Muslim women from the tyranny of post-Islamic society?

One other thing: if you are a man as in the photo at top with the red plaid mini, you definitely should NOT be wearing a skirt at all.

Related: My previous article: SouthWestAirlines to woman: skirt too short to fly