Palau to Become Muslim Nation in Future


By Bernie on 11 Jun 2009




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Traditional Dancers, Palau
Traditional Palau Dancers
Photo Credit: DavidSanger

Well I hope the world finally realizes that Muslims are like crack babies: no one wants to take them in unless they get beaucoup bucks 1. There are less than 21,000 Palauans whose main religion is Christianity with less than 10% practicing Modekngei, a pinapple-Christianity, that is, a mixture of Christianity, fortune-telling, and Palauan religion.

You may be wondering how the Muslim detainees are going to fare in a society where everything passes through the mothers and daughters. Well, wonder no more; thanks to a fellow named Nga-chugalong, a Modekngei Palauan whose expertise is in fortune-telling, I have the answer for you.

Nga-chugalong threw some Bengal eel teeth into a cassava bowl, swirled them like a top, and threw the teeth on the ground. Here is what he interpreted from their pattern:

In 2050, the population of Palua will be 50,000 with the majority religion Muslim. In fact, all ethnic Palauans are Muslim by law, just as ethnic Malays are Muslim by Malay law. Over the years, as the country became more and more Muslim, rapes of tourists increased to such an extent that the once-thriving nation is now bankrupt and relies on pirates to bring in money through ransoms.

Another contributing factor to the decline of tourism has been the fact that although Hula dancing has not been outlawed, one cannot see the coconut bras through the heavy hijabs and many hula dancers have died from heat exhaustion from dancing while so covered.

In 2050, Palau is no longer a matrilineal society; in fact women inherit nothing. They are lucky if they aren't beaten to death.

And that's what happens when you let one Muslim in. In 1900 there were 50 thousand Muslims in the whole of Western Europe. Today it is a thousand times as many: more than 50 million, see Getting Rid of Anal Leakage and Muslim Immigration.






Notes


(1):

CNN, Palau to take Uighur detainees from Gitmo

The Pacific island nation of Palau has agreed to take in 17 Chinese Muslims held at the U.S. prison camp at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, the country's ambassador to the United States said Wednesday.

Details of the transfer are still being worked out, Ambassador Hersey Kyota told CNN.

But Kyota said his country, a former U.S. Pacific trust territory, has agreed to take in the ethnic Uighur detainees "for humanitarian reasons" and because of the "special relationship" between Palau and the United States.






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