The Ultimate Colon Cleanser: Islam
There has been a rise recently in the popularity of colon cleansers in the United States even though there has been no definitive scientific research done to determine whether or not colon cleansing is helpful or not.
WebMd cautions in its article Natural Colon Cleansing: Is It Necessary? that there are potential side effects:
- vomiting, nausea, cramps
- dizziness, a sign of dehydration, which can cause mineral imbalances
- strings of mucus, a sign the body views the cleanser as a toxin
- potential interactions with medications
- bowel perforation
- infection
Now comes word that Islam has a found a modern solution to the colon cleansing problem where one is guaranteed to have his colon cleared of large quantities of stagnant, toxic waste encrusted on colon walls. Weight loss is immediate and the risk of dying of colon cancer is completely eliminated.
A tip of the turban 
to Jihad Watch for this story:
Gulf Daily News, Saudi tightens security to protect oil plants
Saudi Arabia has tightened security at oil facilities after the country's anti-terror chief, Deputy Interior Minister Prince Mohammed bin Nayef, escaped a suicide attack, guards at Abqaiq, the world's biggest oil processing plant, said yesterday.
...
Al Qaeda, meanwhile, claimed responsibility for the suicide attack and said that the bomber, Abdullah Hassan Taleh Al Asiri, had managed to pass security checkpoints and board a private aircraft, Site Intelligence said yesterday.
A statement posted on jihadist forums by Al Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula said Al Asiri passed through checkpoints at Najran airport, near the Yemeni border, and Jeddah airport, the US monitoring service said.
He then boarded Prince Mohammed's private jet with his explosives, according to the statement, which said he finally blew himself up amongst the prince's guards. The site also published a picture of Asiri.
Saudi-owned Al Arabiya TV said Asiri was a 23-year-old Saudi whose brother Ibrahim was also on the wanted list.
It said the attacker concealed the explosives in his anus, allowing him to evade detection.
The network also quoted an expert as saying that the method of concealment aimed the blast away from the target, while blowing the bomber to bits.
We now understand why Saudi royalty demands that all those who enter or leave their presence do so while bowing forward and pointing their butts away from them.
Caveat:
The statements regarding Islamic colon cleansing have not been evaluated by the Food & Drug Administration. The FDA only evaluates foods and drugs, not Muslim suppositories. This IED is not intended to diagnose, prevent, treat, or cure any disease.My readers are advised that the information on this Web site is designed for educational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for informed medical advice or care. Readers should not use this information to diagnose or treat any health problems or illnesses without consulting a doctor.
Not intended for use by persons under 18 years of age. Consult a physician before inserting anything into your rectal cavity and avoid doing so if you have any medical condition including, but not limited to, strokes, high blood pressure, heart, liver, kidney or thyroid disease, diabetes, anemia, depression, anxiety, other psychiatric conditions, a family history of these or other medical conditions, or if taking any prescription, OTC and/or other herbal medications.
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