Elin Nordegren Demands $750 Million in Divorce


By Bernie on 24 May 2010




read-speaker


Elin Nordegren now wants a staggering, ridiculous three-quarter billion dollar divorce settlement from Tiger Woods 1. Unless she took every other swing on the golf course with him, that is the most absurd thing I have ever heard (and I've heard Obama speak).

It is open season on millionaires. All a woman has to do today to cash in big is marry any man and just wait for him to flirt or die. If the guy is very famous, then it is highly likely that other women will be throwing themselves at him and eventually he will succumb, very few men are saints, the wife will have a reason to ask for a divorce and an egregiously large settlement.

For all you idiot men who have beaucoup bucks I have assembled the following prenuptial agreement for you. Do not get married unless the woman signs this. Afraid she won't sign and won't marry you? Bam! I just saved you a hundred million dollars. Any man with tremendous fame and fortune who still lusts after women should not get married. Wait until you cannot stand the sight of a naked woman before you decide to settle down.

Important - Please Read my Disclaimer before taking any of my advice. Doing this now will save you hundreds of millions of dollars and more importantly, keep the divorce from turning very ugly which most high profile divorces seem to do. I bet Tiger Woods is now wishing he had at least signed Elin to a lifetime confidentiality agreement.

Prenuptial Agreement

This pre-marital agreement is made on this ____ day of ______, 20__, between ________________ and ________________.

Whereas the parties intend to marry under the laws of the State of _______________, and wish to set forth in advance of their marriage the rights and privileges that each will have in the property of the other in the event of death, divorce, or other circumstance which results in the termination of their marriage;

Whereas the parties have made to each other a full and complete disclosure of their assets, as set forth in Exhibits 1 and 2 to this agreement;

Whereas both parties have been represented by independent counsel of their own choosing, and whereas both parties have received a full and complete explanation of their legal rights, the consequences of entering into this pre-marital agreement, and the rights they would possess were it not for their voluntary entry into this agreement; and

Whereas both parties acknowledge that they have read and understand this agreement, have not been subjected to any form of coercion, duress, or pressure, and believe this agreement to be fair and to represent their intentions with regard to their assets and to any estate that shall result from their marriage;

The parties hereby agree as follows:


  1. Separate Property

    Each party shall separately retain all of his or her rights in his or her separate property, as enumerated in Exhibits 1 and 2 to this agreement, free and clear of any claim of the other party, without regard to any time or effort invested during the course of the marriage in the maintenance, management, or improvement of that separate property.

  2. At all times, the parties shall enjoy the full right and authority with regard to their separate property as each would have had if not married, including but not limited to the right and authority to use, sell, enjoy, manage, gift and convey the separate property. Both parties agree to execute any documentation necessary to permit the other to exercise these rights, provided the act of executing the documentation does not impose upon them any legal or financial responsibility for the separate property of the other.
  3. The parties agree that each shall be responsible for any tax obligations associated with their separate property.
  4. Dower and Curtesy

    The parties agree that neither shall contest the validity or provisions of any will, account, trust agreement, or other instrument executed by the other which disposes of his or her separate property or which creates any interest therein in another. To the extent that such an action would create any right or interest in the separate property of the other, both parties hereby waive any right in the property of the other, whether created by statute or common law, including but not limited to any right to elect against the will of the other, or to take an intestate share of the other's property. The wife hereby waives any dower interest in the husband's separate property, and the husband hereby waives any curtesy interest in the wife's separate property.

  5. Spousal Support

    Both parties acknowledge that they possess sufficient education and job skills to adequately provide for their own support, and hereby waive any claim to spousal support (alimony) except in the event that:

    1. One of the parties suffers medical disability and the other remains both employed and physically able, in which case the disabled party may receive reasonable spousal support consistent with state law until such time as the disability is resolved, or the other spouse retires or becomes disabled from working, either by agreement or by judicial determination.
    2. The parties mutually agree that one of the parties shall reduce his or her work hours, or shall refrain from working, in order to care for any children born during the course of the marriage, in which case, if the parent's employability is affected by this full or partial withdrawal from employment, that parent may receive reasonable remedial spousal support consistent with state law for a period of not more than two years, either by agreement or judicial determination.
  6. Divorce Clauses


    1. In the event of separation or divorce, the parties shall have no right against each other for division of property existing of this date with the exception of the following:
    2. In the event the divorce is due to adultery,
      1. marital property acquired after marriage shall remain subject to division, but in no case be more than 10% of the offending spouse's total assets at the time of divorce.

      2. Offending spouse agrees to the following conditions regarding custody and access of any children who issue from the marriage: ____________________________ 2.

    3. In the event of separation or divorce, neither party shall disclose the terms of their divorce.
  7. Confidentiality Clause

    Both parties agree to a lifetime confidentiality agreement. Both parties agree never to write a book or publicly disclose details of the marriage unless by mutual consent.

  8. Succession

    This agreement shall be binding and inure to the benefit of the parties, their successors, assigns, and legal representatives.

  9. Enforcement Clause

    Without regard to the location of any property affected by this agreement, this agreement shall be interpreted and enforced under the laws of the state of ____________ 3.

  10. Separability Clause

    In the event that any portion of this agreement shall be held invalid or unenforceable, it is the intent of the parties that all provisions of this agreement be regarded as separable, and that all remaining provisions remain in full force and effect. It is further the desire of the parties that all provisions of this agreement be considered as evidence of their intentions by any court, arbitrator, mediator, or other authority which seeks to divide their estate, and that their intentions be respected whatever the legal status of this agreement or any of its terms.

  11. Entire Agreement

    This Agreement and the exhibits attached hereto contain the entire agreement of the parties. This Agreement may only be amended by a written document duly executed by both parties.

Signed this _______ day of _________________, 20___

_______________________________________
Fiance

_______________________________________
Fiancée

Signed in the presence of:

_______________________________________
Witness

_______________________________________
Witness


[Note- Each witness should sign separately. You should execute this agreement before a notary public.]






When you finally do get married, don't forget to memorialize what you both agreed to before the wedding.

Post-Marital Endorsement

The parties, having entered into this prenuptial agreement in advance of their wedding, which was held on the ____ day of ________, 20__, hereby reaffirm that they entered into this agreement voluntarily, free from coercion, duress, or pressure, with the benefit of the advice of independent counsel of their own choosing, and continue to believe this agreement to be fair and to represent their intentions with regard to their assets and to any estate that shall result from their marriage.

Signed this _______ day of _________________, 20___

_______________________________________
Husband

_______________________________________
Wife

Signed in the presence of:

_______________________________________
Witness

_______________________________________
Witness


[Note- Each witness should sign separately. You should execute the post-nuptial endorsement before a notary public.]

I suggest that you videotape both signings so that later on, if necessary, judges can readily determine that both parties entered into the agreement willingly and without coercion. Also it makes it harder to break the prenup if you allow at least 30 days to pass after the initial signing before getting married.

Please be aware that England and Wales do not enforce prenuptial agreements, so marry elsewhere.

The majority of states have adopted the UPAA (Uniform Premarital Agreement Act), so I suggest both to sign the prenup and to get married in one of those states.

In a related matter, take the case of Paul McCartney's divorce from his blood-sucking whore-wife, whose name I will not mention: Paul worked 53 years to become the most successful songwriter in the history of popular music and built up a fortune estimated to be worth between $600 million and $1.2 billion. But after only 4 years of marriage, whore-wife wanted almost $200 million for her brief marital efforts. If she had spent those 4 years writing songs with him, then she'd be only entitled to 50% of his net increase in assets during those 4 years. But she didn't write any songs any more than Elin Nordegren helped improve Tiger Woods' swing.

Both Woods and McCartney have learned that "Money can't buy me love."







Notes



(1):

The Daily Beast, Elin's Divorce Demands

Tiger may not have much of a roar left once his divorce is through. Bill Zwecker at the Chicago Sun-Times says he knows what Elin wants, and her demands are steep: a $750 million settlement for one, plus full custody of their children. Zwecker also says she’s refusing to sign a confidentiality agreement that would keep her from writing a book or giving interviews about their marriage.

(2):

It should be noted that no U.S. state allows a prenuptial agreement to predetermine issues relating to the children of the marriage.

(3):

Don't fail to designate a specific state, in the absence of a choice of law clause it is the law of the place the parties divorce, not the law of the state they were married that decides property and support issues.






Disclaimer: (This is from my GENERAL DISCLAIMER)

Legal Information

I sometimes provide information about the law designed to help my readers safely cope with their own legal needs. But legal information is not the same as legal advice or how you may apply the law to your individual, specific circumstances. I spend a great deal of time to make sure my information is accurate and useful; however, I recommend that you consult a lawyer (as much as that may be distasteful) if you want professional assurance that my information (and your interpretation of it) is appropriate to your particular situation.

Before you utilize any form I provide (in fact any legal form you find on the Internet), you should have it reviewed by a lawyer in your jurisdiction to be sure that it meets your legal needs, and will be held valid by a court in the jurisdiction where you reside.


My general disclaimer does not cover prenuptial agreement forms so please read this addendum:

Both parties to a prenuptial agreement should be represented by counsel of their choice (in California this is absolutely required if there is any limitation on alimony), the agreement should be crafted to their specific circumstances and the law of the jurisdiction in which they reside, and the prenuptial agreement should be executed at least a month before the wedding date.






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