Photo Credit: Esporte Site

For those unfamiliar with the game, Altinha is a Brazilian beach soccer version of Keepie Uppie which Wikipedia tells us is the skill of juggling with a football [soccer ball] using feet, lower legs, knees, chest, shoulders, and head, without allowing the ball to hit the ground.

Altinha has been a favorite among the Cariocas of Rio (as citizens here are known) for the past few years but has really been heating up in the last year as women started to play (years ago women playing soccer was seen as a lesbian thing).

Red Bull hosted a competition (Red Bull Roda de Bola 2010) for teams made up exclusively of women and were judged for control, creativity and style, all the while without letting the ball drop.

On 16 Oct 2010 eight teams with four players each of the most skillful players of Altinha met at Posto 9 in Ipanema for this unprecedented tournament. The teams were named after famous beaches of Rio de Janeiro, such as Team Ipanema, Team Copacabana, etc.

It has become quite a fad among women in the sands of Rio de Janeiro and another good reason to visit Rio.

Make sure you hit "CC" for the closed caption translation, unless of course you understand Portuguese.

The women seen playing here are healthy, beautiful, exuberant, joyful, spirited, and vibrant. That they excel in a sport long dominated by men must give them great feelings of empowerment. They are not afraid of being women.

That said, let's discuss hijabi babes. Sorry, there are none. Anyway, observant Muslim females should not be going to a crowded beach, especially a beach in Rio De Janiero, even for a walk. The display of semi-nudity is immodest and provocative of evil thoughts. In addition, being covered up in the heat is dangerous to one's health and swimming for burqa-clad women is completely out of the question, even for Muslim women in a burqini.

No public pool or beach should allow a veiled Muslim woman to swim. If she is wearing a burqa, it increases the risk of drowning for her and anyone else who tries to save her - it is unfair to place an infidel lifeguard in greater danger because of Muslim stupidity.

If she is wearing a burqini, something that is not too dangerous for swimming, there is still a risk for the infidel lifeguard. Let me explain: If a lifeguard pulls a Muslim woman out of the water, he takes his life in his hands administering mouth-to-mouth or simply unveiling her to public view. If she is this religious, so likely is her husband who may take great offense to his honor and feel compelled to kill the lifeguard. Why should lifeguards have to worry about such things?

Now the prudent lifeguard should simply let her die. Of course, there is a risk this may bring charges of felony negligence against him. No, it is much safer if beaches simply banned veiled women from swimming altogether.

And if you do see a hijabi on the beach, you will not observe a healthy, beautiful, exuberant, joyful, spirited, and vibrant woman. What you see is an unhappy slave to a barbaric cult.