Of course Santa could have avoided a strip search if only he had worn a turban instead of his hat. He already has a beard, so all that he needed to do was act obnoxious, yell out "Islamophobes, racists, bigots," give out an "Allah Akbar" here and there and the US government agents, per protocol, would have been cowed into letting him pass unimpeded, uninspected and ungroped.

For Santa's wife, if she travels with him, I recommend wearing a full hijab; in this way she can demand that she pat herself down.

From CAIR’s press release:

Special recommendations for Muslim women who wear hijab:

• If you are selected for secondary screening after you go through the metal detector and it does not go off, and "sss" is not written on your boarding pass, ask the TSA officer if the reason you are being selected is because of your head scarf.


• In this situation, you may be asked to submit to a pat-down or to go through a full body scanner. If you are selected for the scanner, you may ask to go through a pat-down instead.


• Before you are patted down, you should remind the TSA officer that they are only supposed to pat down the area in question, in this scenario, your head and neck. They SHOULD NOT subject you to a full-body or partial-body pat-down.


• You may ask to be taken to a private room for the pat-down procedure.


• Instead of the pat-down, you can always request to pat down your own scarf, including head and neck area, and have the officers perform a chemical swipe of your hands.


• If you encounter any issues, ask to speak to a supervisor immediately. They are there to assist you.

CONTACT: CAIR National Communications Director Ibrahim Hooper, 202-744-7726, or 202-488-8787, E-Mail: ihooper@cair.com; CAIR Communications Coordinator Amina Rubin, 202-488-8787, 202-341-4171, E-Mail: arubin@cair.com

Ahhh, how convenient to be a Muslim in America, the infidels are so accommodating - they aim to appease.