These are Not Funny Muslim Jokes


By Bernie on 27 Jun 2011

Not all Muslim jokes are meant to be funny. The following are not really jokes at all but are purposely written to be offensive to Muslims.

The reason for that is that I need to vent.

In just the last 48 hours Muslims have blown two young girls apart, torn two children apart, slaughtered a dozen police, massacred twenty-five patrons at a tavern, and detonated an 8-year-old girl near a checkpoint (1).

sexy yooung girl in showerThe following will not bring back any lives, but hopefully if these insults are repeated often enough, if we ridicule Muslims enough, if we convince one less person to want to become a Muslim because being a Muslim is a shameful and disgusting thing, then these offensive statements will have served a useful purpose.

Here you go:

Q: What's the best thing about having sex with a 9 year old in the shower?
A: If you pull her hair back she looks only 6.




Ahmed was taking a course on appliance repair at a technical school when the teacher asked him, "What do you do when your dishwasher doesn't get the dishes clean enough?"

Without missing a beat, Ahmed replied, "I beat her until she gets it right."




Q: What does the average Pakistani in London do after sex?
A: About ten to life.




Q: What do you say to a Muslim in a suit?
A: Will the defendant please rise.





Q: What do you do if you see a Muslim running around in a circle screaming?
A: Stop laughing and nail his other foot to the floor.




Q: What's the difference between a Muslim and my bike?
A: It's not funny when you throw my bike off a bridge!




Ahmet, being a typical Pakistani man, was addicted to American porn and noted that the female porn stars were hairless in their nether regions. He asked his friend Mahmud if he ever had sex with anyone like that, you know, bald down there. Mahmud replied, "Sure, but it's quite a bother putting the diaper back on."




Q: What do you get when you cross a pig with a Muslim?
A: Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.




Q: What's the worst thing you can call a Muslim?
A: A neighbor.




If a tree falls on a Muslim in the forest, and no one is
around to hear it, is it still hilarious?






ENDNOTES


(1):

The Religion of Peace, Islam's Latest Contributions to Peace

2011.06.27 (Maiduguri, Nigeria) - Two young girls are blown to bits by Islamic bombers.

2011.06.27 (Ghazni, Afghanistan) - Two children are among seven civilians torn apart by two Taliban roadside blasts.

2011.06.27 (Dera Ismail Khan, Pakistan) - A dozen police are taken hostage and then slaughtered by a husband and wife suicide team.

2011.06.26 (Meiram, Sudan) - Arab militiamen attack a train carrying Southerners, killing one.

2011.06.26 (Maiduguri, Nigeria) - Islamists massacre twenty-five patrons at a tavern serving alcohol by tossing in bombs and firing into the building.

2011.06.26 (Char Chino, Afghanistan) - The Taliban denotate an 8-year-old girl near a checkpoint.









Anyone may republish this article for non-commercial use without asking my permission. I make it easy, see details here.


Related Posts with Thumbnails
If this is your first time here, please read my Comment Policy HERE.

comments powered by Disqus


















HOME



Info


Email Me

FAQ/About Me

Search/Archives

Site Policies

Testimonials

My Articles in Danish

Follow Me:

subscribe to my Feedvia RSS Feed

subscribe to comment Feedvia my Comments Feed

subscribe to my YouTube Feedvia my YouTube Feed


View My Stats




Shameless Advertising


This is what Bernie is Reading Now



For Previous Books Click Here.





Comments



Buttons & Widgets


Locations of visitors to this page
Older Buttons



Blogs That Link to Me:


123beta
A collection of things...
Always on Watch
Americans Stand with Israel
Animal Magnetism
Apropos of Nothing
AUSSIE THOUGHTS
Bare Naked Islam
Basil’s Blog
BelchSpeak
Blazing Cat Fur
Blogging for a free world
BlogWrath
Celestial Offerings
Cmblake6's Weblog
Commonsense & Wonder
Conjecture and Consequence
Conservative Thoughts
Cosmic Cogitations
Cristy Li
Daily Blasphemies
David Drake
DiveDesk
DragonLady’s World
Eclecticity
Elder of Ziyon
Empyreum Cœlum
Eye of Polyphemus
Fausta’s Blog
Fiery Spirited Zionist
foolocracy
Gates of Vienna
GDCritter
Gummihund/ Rubberdog and a proud Orangutan
Hard to Swallow
Hodjanernes Blog
Huff-Watch
Infidel Bloggers Alliance
Infidelio
Infidels Against Islamophobia
Infidels Are Cool
Intergalactic Source of Truth
Iron Burka
Israel Matzav
Jewish Preppers
Jihadi Du Jour
Leather Penguin
Maggie’s Notebook
MFS - The Other News
mlah.us
Monkey in the Middle
Muellerstuff
Muslims Attack
My Gripes of Wrath
My Newz 'n Ideas
Neanderpundit
News on the March
News360
Nicholas Hunter Folkes
No Apology
nothing to laugh at
Nuke's
OBAMA CARTOONS
Oswald Bastable’s Ranting
Outside the Camp
Pakshahara
Perigo Islâmico (In Portuguese)
Pirate's Cove
pislamonausea Central
Project 2,996
Prune Juice Media
RADARSITE
Ramrock's Blog (In Spanish)
Remember Amalek
Right Nation
Right Pundits
Right Truth
Right-wing Agenda
Rightjab
Rosemary’s Thoughts
Sherryx’s Weblog
Silence the messenger
Silicon Valley Redneck
Simply Jews
Smooth Stone
So Far, So Good ...So What!
SPLINA ULTRAGIATĂ A ZIONULUI
Squid Thoughts
Stop Islamic Conquest
StormBringer
SumanSpeaks
Sunday Morning Coffee
Synopsis
Tales of a Wandering Mind
TAYLOR TOPICS
The Amboy Times
The Astute Bloggers
The Christian Defender
The Infidel Task Force
The Lambeth Walk
The Lunatic's Asylum
The Mindset
The Old Curmudgeon
THE OUTRAGED SPLEEN OF ZION
The Political Commentator
The Right Nation
The Sandman
The Sassy Tn’T PoLITicallY InCorrect
THE TEXAS SCRIBBLER
The Unreligious Right
The Virtuous Republic
Theo Spark
Third World County
TheRightRant
Thunder Pig
Transhumanisten
Treppenwitz
Unicorns and Rainbows
usa stands with israel
Veritas Universalis
Western Civilization and Culture
wine women and transcendence
Working the Web
Xanthippa's Chamberpot
Zilla of the Resistance
Zionism, Rebbi Nachman, and Rav Kook




Before you vote in the following poll , read Hamas Home Protection Services.

Would You Kill to Protect Your Family?
  
pollcode.com free polls