Coon Hollow capers / [sheet music]
Photo Credit: Performing Arts Encyclopedia, Library of Congress

An African-American man named Clinton Tucker has filed a lawsuit against his former employer, Benjamin Moore, because the company sold paints with "despicable and racially insulting paint colors." Let me say that if a company has more than 3400 paint color names, it's bound to insult most ethnic and racial groups, if that group is purposely looking to gin up a bogus lawsuit.

Here's the story:

UPI, Former Benjamin Moore employee sues company over 'racially insulting paint colors'

African-American man Clinton Tucker filed the suit about the colors "clinton brown" and "tucker chocolate."

...

According to Tucker's suit, the company named a color "tucker chocolate" after he worked on a project to help launch the company's Main Street Matters campaign.

"Being a black man named Clinton Tucker, the plaintiff found this to be extremely racially offensive" the suit states.

Tucker claims he voiced his concerns at a meeting and that his remarks were met with "awkward silence."

"Clinton brown" and "confederate red" are other types of Benjamin Moore paints.

Does Mr. Tucker really expect a court to believe that Benjamin Moore Paints, an American company owned by Berkshire Hathaway, has the time and sense of humor to name paints after him merely to make fun of him?

It should be noted that the company also has names such as "tucker orange" and "tucker gray."

What if a gay man whose last name is Melrose decides to apply to work for the company just so he could later sue over the company's color "melrose pink"? Should Benjamin Moore be forced to drop the names of colors that someone, somewhere finds offensive?

Suppose a black family moves into Coon Hollow Road in Lloyd Harbor, NY? Can they ask the village to change the name of the road because it's offensive to blacks?

But let's not misunderstand - it's not just blacks who are too sensitive of supposedly offensive names. We recall the demands for the owner of the Redskins to change the name of the team because a few liberal idiots think Native Americans might be offended (I already suggested it be changed to the Washington Foreskins).

Four years ago in my article Politically Incorrect Colors, I reported that the PC folks in Atlanta accused the city of being a bunch of racist bastards because they dared to call the new spur line on their subway system the “yellow line.” I suppose they thought that yellow is code for small penises and good grades in school. Now that someone is suing Benjamin Moore for its paint names, next we'll hear from the Chinese from Norway because the paint company's color "viking yellow" is offensive.

Will the Swine Flu one day be changed because it's offensive to Muslims?

Even words that are not offensive but misunderstood may offend someone somewhere. We recall the case where a white man was forced to resign because he used the word niggardly and offended an ignorant black person.

Where will this stop? What am I saying? It may already be too late, we've already slid down that slippery slope. Oops, did I just offend Asian prostitutes?